You, Too, Can Look Good In A Bikini

By Chris Geozian (Grade 12)

There is nothing quite like a really well-done ad campaign. Ads evoke many emotions and dormant opinions deep inside us. They make us happy, they make us sad, they make us cynical, they employ hundreds of thousands of Americans, and are an irreplaceable part of our culture. Case in point, they’ve become a staple of the Super Bowl to the point that there are ads for the ads. Annoying as they may be, we need ads to boost our economy.


For example, there is a new ad for Denny’s Restaurant about their breakfast lover’s trio. In the ads, there is a single man dressed simply in a dark plaid shirt; this man is portrayed as a manly man, a blue collar icon if you will. In one of the ads in this ad campaign, the man starts a monologue: “What’s the deal with all these people rushing to work, drinking their mochaccinos, cappuccinos, choclaccinos, whateverccinos…” All these things are associated with Starbuck’s coffee shops. Oh, and did I mention the patriotic music? Yeah there’s that, too. He also says, after the product is introduced, “Listen, coffee and milk foam is not a meal” and at the end of the commercial he says “Thank you and good morning,” as he holds up a mug of hot coffee in a sort of toast to America and all its blue collar workers. The best part is the subtle implication they’re making here that if you patronize Starbuck’s, you’re unpatriotic. Truly a superb ad, a classic, if you will.

This next ad is directed at women; I’m sure all of you have seen it at least once. This ad is for Old Spice body wash and it starts off in a bathroom where there’s a half naked muscular black dude talking about how he is so much better than the ladies’ “man.” He says “…sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using lady-scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he was me.” The scene switches to a boat where his towel is traded for white pants and a sweater tied around his neck. He says “Now look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. Look at your hand, now look at me. I have it; it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Now look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady.” With an abrupt “I’m on a horse,” the camera pans out and he is indeed on a horse. The tagline reads, “Smell like a man, man.” The implications are much more overt in this ad; in fact they are more like suggestions.

Of course, there are a handful of terrible ads. The UPS ad that features a man in a lady’s wig is a good example. In this ad, a man in a lady’s wig demonstrates the advantages of using UPS. Another terrible ad is AT&T’s ad to counter the Verizon maps ad campaign, which is also terrible but in a whole different way (it’s just really, really annoying). This ad just seems incredibly weak, like AT&T didn’t even try. Of course there are the various annoying ads that are everywhere: Sit’n’Sleep, most car commercials, commercials for certain restaurant chains such as Applebee’s and Outback Steakhouse, and all ads where celebrities sell out in the worst way possible (yes I’m talking about you, Michael Phelps and Subway) just to name a few.

I want to discuss a few gems as far as advertisements go, the first being the Terry Tate Office Linebacker ads for the Super Bowl in 2003 that Reebok did. These are pure genius. Definitely the Carl’s Jr./Paris Hilton ad for the Super Bowl. Fast food restaurants generally come out with good ad campaigns. As far as Subway goes, they’ve had some stellar ad campaigns that are effective: the 5 dollar foot-longs campaign started as promotion by a single shop owner in Florida who owned a few stores. This caught the attention of the higher ups on the corporate ladder and presto. A winning ad campaign.

Ah, there really is beauty, wit, humor, and truth in good advertising.